OUCH! One mother wrote us about how her two-year-old had mastered the sneak attack. Just when all seemed well, he'd chomp down on the nearest piece of flesh and bear down like a bulldog. Her initial response could not be categorized as "Love and Logic," particularly when it was her own skin he was munching. His eyes lit up like Christmas morning every time she screamed, "Stop it! Cut it out! Don't bite!"
After studying our Early Childhood Package she and her husband decided to run an experiment: Every time he bit them, they'd do their best to calmly sing, "Uh oh" and gently buckle him into his high chair or stroller.In the process of planning their little experiment, they decided to make sure that…He would be completely safeThey would do their best to be empathetic instead of angryThey didn't reinforce the behavior by trying to talk to him while he was incarceratedThey didn't let him out before he was calmOf course, he wasn't impressed with this approach. He cried, screamed, begged and even tried to bite them from a distance. As soon as he calmed down, they'd give him a kiss on the cheek and let him out.Mom was proud to report that the little guy was starting to curb his cannibalistic cravings. Staying calm and providing a meaningful consequence really seemed to be the key!
Thanks for reading!
Dr. Charles Fay
Mother's Day Craftastic Monday Link Party
4 days ago
1 comment:
from experience, it's hard to sing "uh-oh" cheerfully when you suddenly have a searing bite pain on your shoulder/arm/hand unexpectedly! we have FINALLY made biting progress since tess has been able to talk and understand language. we talk about being a "good friend" and that good friends don't bite, and she has got to the point where if I say she's a "good friend" she will volunteer that "Tessie no bite Cha-Cha!" her friend. So she is connecting it all together and she hasn't bitten another kid (or me) in a months. I had to wait for language and comprehension to come though, punishment of all sorts wasn't doing it...good luck to moms of biters, i sympathize and never thought MY kid would be a biter!
PS-my husband was a biter in day care and got bit back around age four by a daycare provider (a whole other topic!). He still remembers it to this day, hates the person for doing it, but never bit again....
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